So it’s been awhile since I’ve worked around large amounts of people (bath and body works, early 2009). Working at my mom’s dog grooming shop was kind of close, but really, I barely had to see any humans besides my mom and sister. But now I’m working at fast food, and I have to say, even though I love my job and co-workers, I fucking HATE some of the people. Seriously, I cannot fathom some of the things our customers do. And my job barely requires me to be near customers. I’m basically a fucking janitor, and I’m still seeing/hearing things that would make my job drop if I didn’t have to fake being a happy human being (rather than the narcissistic, pessimistic asshole that I am). Here are some examples of how much people suck.
~ ~ ~
So I was cleaning the windows on the front doors, and this old man is just kind of standing there watching me. As I finish one section, he says something to the effect of
“they sure keep you busy here!”
I grin and reply “oh, it’s not too bad. I don’t mind the work.”
It’s at this point that the old man places his hand on the section he just watched me clean, and proceeds to drag his hand down the glass.
My composure around guests is generally moderately unshakeable. I am a smiling force of nature. A pack of rampaging homophobic Mormon missionaries couldn’t shake my false composure.
but this single act literally caused my jaw to drop.
And then the old fart looked me straight in the eye, and said…
“just making sure you keep busy”
and then he left.
~ ~ ~
Another fine example happened when I was cleaning the bathrooms. I had finished the boy’s room, and was nearly finished with the women’s, when suddenly someone tries to open the door. The knob jiggled, then it jiggled a bit more, and then the door violently shook, and finally, there was a polite and quiet knock.
“I’ll be out in just a moment” I said. And less than 30 seconds, I walked out to find a woman waiting by the door.
“you know…” said the woman “I’m REALLY uncomfortable with a man cleaning the woman’s restroom. How do I know you’re not some sort of peeping Tom?”
“well ma’am, that’s unlikely since it’s a one person restroom.” I replied without letting my false charisma falter. The woman’s face contorts into a look of extreme insult, and she quickly snaps back at me.
“WELL HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?!?” she then pushes her way into the restroom and attempts to slam the door (which isn’t really possible, given the mechanism of the door.)
~ ~ ~
so this story didn’t happen to me directly, but rather, it happened to my coworker. The work phone is ringing at 6:00am, and Ashlee answers it. Now, I only have ashlee’s side of the conversation, but I’ll give what I’m pretty sure the caller said.
Ash: Thank you for calling Oak Harbor fast food, how can I help you?
Caller: HI, do you have teriyaki bowls?
Ash: I’m sorry, we don’t have those available at the moment. We should have them later today.
~ ~ ~
So I was cleaning the windows on the front doors, and this old man is just kind of standing there watching me. As I finish one section, he says something to the effect of
“they sure keep you busy here!”
I grin and reply “oh, it’s not too bad. I don’t mind the work.”
It’s at this point that the old man places his hand on the section he just watched me clean, and proceeds to drag his hand down the glass.
My composure around guests is generally moderately unshakeable. I am a smiling force of nature. A pack of rampaging homophobic Mormon missionaries couldn’t shake my false composure.
but this single act literally caused my jaw to drop.
And then the old fart looked me straight in the eye, and said…
“just making sure you keep busy”
and then he left.
~ ~ ~
Another fine example happened when I was cleaning the bathrooms. I had finished the boy’s room, and was nearly finished with the women’s, when suddenly someone tries to open the door. The knob jiggled, then it jiggled a bit more, and then the door violently shook, and finally, there was a polite and quiet knock.
“I’ll be out in just a moment” I said. And less than 30 seconds, I walked out to find a woman waiting by the door.
“you know…” said the woman “I’m REALLY uncomfortable with a man cleaning the woman’s restroom. How do I know you’re not some sort of peeping Tom?”
“well ma’am, that’s unlikely since it’s a one person restroom.” I replied without letting my false charisma falter. The woman’s face contorts into a look of extreme insult, and she quickly snaps back at me.
“WELL HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?!?” she then pushes her way into the restroom and attempts to slam the door (which isn’t really possible, given the mechanism of the door.)
~ ~ ~
so this story didn’t happen to me directly, but rather, it happened to my coworker. The work phone is ringing at 6:00am, and Ashlee answers it. Now, I only have ashlee’s side of the conversation, but I’ll give what I’m pretty sure the caller said.
Ash: Thank you for calling Oak Harbor fast food, how can I help you?
Caller: HI, do you have teriyaki bowls?
Ash: I’m sorry, we don’t have those available at the moment. We should have them later today.
Caller: WHAT?!? THAT’S BULLSHIT!!!
Ash: well I’m afraid we don’t have any rice at the moment, and it will take awhile for the rice to cook.
Caller: WELL I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! YOU SHOULD HAVE THAT STUFF READY ALL DAY LONG!!!
Ash: I’m sorry ma’am, but we don’t serve those at night, and it takes time to cook the rice.
Caller: WELL I DON’T NEED THE RICE, I HAVE MY OWN. I JUST NEED THE REST OF THE STUFF.
Ash: I suppose we could do that for you…
Caller: IT’S BULLSHIT THAT YOU DON’T HAVE THE RICE THOUGH! WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE! HAVEN’T YOU EVER HEARD OF GOOD CUSTOMER SERVICE?!?!?
this conversation went on for some time, and once it became apparent that the woman really only wanted to yell at someone, she was hung up on.
that’s not the end of the story, the woman called us non-stop for the next half hour until another of my co-workers answered and told the woman she could come in and we’d happily give her a teriyaki bowl without the rice.
the woman never came in.
Ash: well I’m afraid we don’t have any rice at the moment, and it will take awhile for the rice to cook.
Caller: WELL I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS! YOU SHOULD HAVE THAT STUFF READY ALL DAY LONG!!!
Ash: I’m sorry ma’am, but we don’t serve those at night, and it takes time to cook the rice.
Caller: WELL I DON’T NEED THE RICE, I HAVE MY OWN. I JUST NEED THE REST OF THE STUFF.
Ash: I suppose we could do that for you…
Caller: IT’S BULLSHIT THAT YOU DON’T HAVE THE RICE THOUGH! WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE! HAVEN’T YOU EVER HEARD OF GOOD CUSTOMER SERVICE?!?!?
this conversation went on for some time, and once it became apparent that the woman really only wanted to yell at someone, she was hung up on.
that’s not the end of the story, the woman called us non-stop for the next half hour until another of my co-workers answered and told the woman she could come in and we’d happily give her a teriyaki bowl without the rice.
the woman never came in.
~ ~ ~
Ah Mikey how I have missed your blog posts....... :)
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